DO NOT LET THE DOE EYES FOOL YOU.
She is sharp-tongued. She is devious. She is clever. She is downright evil. Do not cross her for the next sentence to pass her lips (especially if it begins, "Frankly...") could be the last one you hear. She has been known to cut grown men in two (thus bringing them to her eye level) with her well-crafted utterances.

She also laughs like Muttley when she really gets going. She will dive into a freezing pool fully clothed to save your drowning epileptic dog. She is the only other adult I know who listens to the Muppet Movie soundtrack in the car (even when her son, Steven, is not with her). She can recite "Strange Brew." She can rattle off every Pope who's ever lived and indicate how each of them were corrupted. She does an amazing fish dance (everyone ask her to do it at the wedding, okay?) and can make her legs sing in vibrato (everyone don't ask her to do it at the wedding, okay?).

But mostly she's evil.